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Buffalo Sports-Men Behaving Badly - Blather. Rants. Repeat.
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Buffalo Sports-Men Behaving Badly

It's the off-season for our two top-level professional teams, but they've been in the news a lot for their early training sessions, off-season signings (including new big-name coaches for both Bills and Sabres) and the promise of good things in the season ahead.

Alas, this is Buffalo. And since the X-Files is back in production with Cancer Man still in the cast, it's only right to expect things to go horribly wrong:



Here's just what the past few days have brought us from our beloved sports heroes:

First, Da Bills. Their new offensive line coach proved just how offensive he can be, getting arrested in Florida last week for assaulting a minor over.... a beach chair. And if that wasn't goofy enough,....

You know teenagers. You can’t live with them, but apparently you can push them to the ground and punch them in the face. That’s what Walton County police said Kromer did after charging the Bills’ offensive line coach with battery over the weekend.

The boys’ response to Kromer threatening to kill their family if they called the cops, allegedly, was doing the right thing and calling the cops on Kromer. Within hours, he faced the indignity of having his mug shots taken. I almost didn’t recognize him without his baseball cap and headset.

Apparently this guy also got into a hissy when he was on the coaching staff of Da Bears, and had to issue a tearful apology for publicly berating that team's golden-boy quarterback. At least that can't happen here, because we don't have one.

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Things were no better on the defensive side of the ball, for word quickly followed that a player in the Bills' secondary had gotten into a nasty Twitter spat with a porn star:

Duke Williams learned the hard way that adult film star Mia Khalifa will expose people who hit on her via Twitter direct messages.

According the screencap Khalifa posted, Williams, a fourth-round draft pick by the Bills in 2013, sent direct message inquiries in February, March, May, June and July. Must have been a busy April.

Khalifa did not respond until she received the fifth separate message and then made her note public to emphasize the point. Warning: contains vulgar language.

    Warning: Trespassers in my DM's will be shot and hung out to dry in public. pic.twitter.com/aPUGkmooat
    — Mia Khalifa (@miakhalifa) July 12, 2015

At least in this one, it wasn't the Bills employee making threats. Also, "Duke Williams" sounds like more of a porn star name than "Mia Khalifa" does.

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As these stories came round, I thought, hey, at least the nice hockey players and coaches are staying out of trouble.

Aw hell no:

Just six days after signing the richest contract in franchise history, Buffalo Sabres center Ryan O’Reilly was arrested last week and charged with driving a motor vehicle while ability impaired and leaving the scene of an accident after his pickup truck reportedly rammed into a Tim Hortons cafe in Lucan, Ont.

The incident took place last Thursday morning at approximately 4:05 a.m. and was announced Monday night by the Ontario Provincial Police’s Middlesex County detachment. It was first reported by radio station CFPL-AM in London, Ont.

According to Middlesex County OPP, O’Reilly’s 1951 Chevrolet pickup truck struck the Tim Hortons on Richmond Street in Lucan, a township of about 4,500 located roughly a half-hour north of London. Police say O’Reilly continued to drive the vehicle for a short time before abandoning it and moving on foot with an unnamed male passenger.

So the new first-line center is facing DUI charges, a leaving-the-scene rap, and almost certain NHL discipline.  Adding to the irony was his choice of landing spot: the namesake of the Tim Hortons donut chain was a former Sabre, who died in a car accident while driving under the influence himself.

Then again, the Sabres honor HIM with a retired number in the rafters and a statue at the flagship location of the restaurant chain next to their arena.  We should only be so lucky with O'Reilly- assuming the Cigarette Smoking Man will allow it.


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