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"Because it feels so good when I stop." - Blather. Rants. Repeat.
A Møøse once bit my sister ...
"Because it feels so good when I stop."

What is, Why are you banging your head against the wall doing real estate?

Yep- I'm in Final Jeopardy again.  Any time I touch one of these deals, the only real estate law that applies is Murphy's.  Years ago, I came back from a failed closing in such a bad mood, I tossed my briefcase at a potted plant.  I should know not to. I have qualified friends who can do them. Yet I can do them. I'm good at them. I just attract difficulties like hydrogen atoms attract each other. As in inside H-bombs.

This one's a short sale. Everyone agrees on the figures, including the bank getting the net money.  I turned in most of my stuff weeks ago. Last Tuesday, I finally got the "curatives"- what the title examiner needed to close.

He needed a lot. And I got it all to them by Thursday, or at least worked out how to deal with the things.  But they needed more. And kept needing more so it didn't close on Friday.

That made a difference, since there are unpaid property taxes involved, and those have monthly payoffs, not daily ones. Which means hundreds of extra bucks nobody has if we go into June. But wait! Since the 31st is a Sunday, the town will take the May figure today- but only in person.  So I came back to Rochester late this morning, worked through all the final arrangements (including a ridiculous and meaningless corporate state form that you must file but you cannot obtain without jumping through hoops), and we closed at the other lawyer's office over two hours ago. I've been sitting in the town library next to the town hall in question since 3, waiting for the call that it's gone on record and I can disburse....

and got a call, all right. From the seventh circle of hell.

The county rejected one of the ancillary recording forms as obsolete.  It's a routine recording document I've had, in fillable .pdf format, on my computer since 2007, and used as recently as my last closing last year. They won't take it. It barcodes the fillins and if ANY of them is imperfect, you fail.  Never mind that everyone else in the deal saw I was using the 2007 form, and nobody else noticed, either.

It's being redone as we speak, hopefully in time to get it done so I can pay this stupid thing and go home.

I am putting a contract out on myself. A contingent one, though. Rocco "The Realtor" Rococo has my permission to whack me if I ever even think of doing this again.

ETA. Done. Got it recorded at 4:59 p.m. Four minutes earlier, with everyone's permission, I paid the taxes. Any closer shave and I'd have the head of a cueball. Happy, but still too old for this shiz.

4 comments or Leave a comment
ellettra From: ellettra Date: June 1st, 2015 09:25 pm (UTC) (Link)
OMG! What a gigantic pain in the ass!
captainsblog From: captainsblog Date: June 1st, 2015 11:07 pm (UTC) (Link)
Got it done. But yeah. The people in the town clerk's office were as nice as the county people were annoying. I even got to see them giving a marriage license to a couple (with a baby) right before the last minute, so my pain got them hitched several minutes sooner:)
ellettra From: ellettra Date: June 1st, 2015 11:41 pm (UTC) (Link)
Way to find the silver lining! The firm I work for represents governments, special districts and counties, and so we see the other side of all of this. It is no less painful, but in a different way. I focus on land use, and the permits required for development ... or to do ANYTHING essentially... are just so freaking bureaucratic. For example, a citizen applied to close a portion of his street for a block party and basketball tournament, the proceeds of which would go to a local charity. Welllllllll..... that street is a collector, and so the permitting process was different, and performing a charity fund drive in the public right of way has a whole other set of rules and regs... the citizen went nuts (as would any normal person) and sent Many Angry Emails to the city, which is when we had to get involved. I felt so bad for the guy. He just wanted to put up some barricades, open the grill, and play some ball for charity, but it had to be a huge ordeal. I just wanted to tell him, "Put up some lawn chairs, dude. If a cars starts to come down the road, they're obviously going to turn around. It's not like anyone is going to get out and challenge you for your permit."

Honestly I don't know how I ended up doing muni law work because I am almost always not on the side of our clients, haahahahaha
glenmarshall From: glenmarshall Date: June 2nd, 2015 02:58 am (UTC) (Link)
I have an old HS friend whose law practice is defending DUIs and other traffic offenses. I don't know how he does it with a straight face, so I asked at the HS reunion last year. He said that he enjoyed making the police and prosecutors do their job. Good answer. And he apparently has done well.
4 comments or Leave a comment